Godly people are smooth down there, like Barbie and Ken

Between this story, this story, and this story, I am beginning to question the very sanity of the sex-is-filthy crowd. I mean, do they think that if they just deny that human beings have genitals long and hard enough, those genitals will just disappear? The irony of all this is that the same groups that send out the emails and protests in a panic that a child might know what a nude body looks like are the very same groups that make up the marching troops of the Gender Police. (Thanks, Mary Garth.) I mean, if you're that invested in making sure that kids know that boys and girls are Different, how can you be against pictures and statues where the all-holy difference is unmistakable?

I was going to write a little fake news story about a group called People Protecting the Purity of Children that is calling for mandatory C-sections to prevent innocent babies from seeing vaginas, but at this point I don't know if you could even call that for satire.