Times like these will give you hope

I know I blogged about this yesterday, but goshdurnit, it's the sort of thing you like to relish.

Schrock, elected in 2001 to serve as president of his Republican freshman class, said he will "no longer be the Republican nominee" from his district, which encompasses the world's largest naval base in Norfolk and all of Virginia Beach.

Shrock made his decision yesterday, his chief of staff said, in large part fol- lowing allegations made on a Web site. That site alleged Aug. 19 that Schrock made a habit of "rendezvousing with gay men" through an interactive telephone service but supported "homophobic" legislation. Schrock has co-sponsored a proposed constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage.

Maybe he thought if it were in the Constitution, it would act as a magical charm to scrub the homo out.

Schrock is "absolutely not" gay, nor is he bisexual, Gordy said in reply to a reporter's questions. The lawmaker is married and the father of a grown son.

Of course he's not. Don't all straight men occasionally suck some cock to relax once in awhile? We know that he's straight because he's, um, straightforward in his tastes in men.

Uh, hi, I weigh 200 pounds, uh, six-foot-four, hazel eyes, blond hair, very muscular, very buffed-up, uh, very tanned, um, I'd just like to get together with a guy from time to time just to -- just to play. I'd like him to be, uh, in very good shape, flat stomach, good chest, good arms, well-hung, cut, uh, just get naked, play, and see what happens, nothing real heavy duty, but just a fun time, go down on him, he can go down on me, and just, uh, take it from there. Hope to hear from you. Bye.

And then a round of golf, which is how he knows he's straight. Because he can hit the ball straight.