Mouse rant blog vent mouse.

Tuesday, June 08, 2004

Hooking up, one night stands, and movies I saw in high school

Alas, a Blog exposes how the right wing is shoring up the panic around the "hook up" by coughing up some supposedly alarming numbers. This panic is just another media invention, of course, a right wing campaign to keep voters remembering that few, if any, things are scarier than female sexuality. There's always one under way, and it's always the same old strategy and I'm surprised more people don't see through it.
Look, slang changes. Slang around sex is notorious for both changing quickly and for having a few standards that are the oldest words in the language. Because there is a new term for something doesn't mean that there's a new sexual behavior--in fact, far from it. A new term for something just means that the old term sounds antiquated to a new generation so they abandon it. Most of the articles I've seen regarding this supposedly new trend of "hooking up" actually manage to employ the term heard most frequently in the 80's--"casual sex". Young people don't say "casual sex" because it sounds sort of clinical. We've also abandoned "rendevous", "encounter", and "one night stand". I'm sure there's more, but that's just off the top of my head.
If anything is different about hooking up than the old standby, the one night stand, than apparently it is that young people seem to be electing to substitute intercourse with oral sex. I've been out of college for mmph years and I'll tell you that this is not really all that new, 'cause we did it in college. In fact, the do-blow-jobs-count debate was in circulation long before Bill Clinton got caught cheating. You can hear it in all its glory in a movie that I saw in high school, mmph years ago called Clerks. Yeah, I thought you might have seen it. And god knows that it was the common practice when I was in college, though, if I remember correctly, most people expected men to reciprocate. In fact, that seems to still be the case amongst my single friends, and I'll bet it's probably truer than people would like to think with younger people.
There's evidence that the whole oral sex as a substitute thing is, if not exactly new, than still not old as time itself. Even in the 60's, people apparently thought you didn't do that until you've been having sex with someone for awhile. Well, we've evolved. If girls feel now that they shouldn't put themselves in danger of getting pregnant with every casual encounter (see, I still use older terms!), good for them. My suspicion is that if this is a trend, then it's a female-driven trend for that very reason. Of course, that women are calling the some of the shots in bed now is exactly what's alarming to conservatives, even if they can't state it outright.
Well, they needn't be too concerned. The double standard is alive and well. I spend alot of my time hanging out with a bunch of guys who have all but forgotten that I'm female, and they cheerfully compare notes, and they don't refrain from bragging and using vulgar terms. And no one is pursing his lips in disapproval or saying that something is "slutty". But even though my girl friends are no shrinking violets when it comes to talking about their own sexuality, it's unlikely they would make jokes about fucking alot of guys or speculate on some guy's oral sex skills, which are common enough topics of conversation amongst the guys I know.


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