Mouse rant blog vent mouse.

Friday, November 26, 2004

Manipulate that man into your boyfriend

Since we already know that men don't want to have committed relationships and women always want them, the problem that confronts us poor women is how to get a man to give in and commit. Cosmo is here to save the day. Their suggestion? To talk to him? Threaten to leave if you don't get a commitment? Get drunk, sleep with someone else and then laugh at him if he complains, pointing out that he doesn't have the right?

No, apparently not. These things can backfire and run a guy off. And since we know that half a man is better than no man at all, even if he's an asshole, you have to manipulate a guy into thinking commitment is his idea. Here are the tricks.

Take up extreme sports. Do that, and he may think he's losing you. The point here isn't so much that you risk your life but that you actually create more of a life outside his orbit. Canceling a date because you want to make him jealous is lame, but canceling a date because, hey, you've got your karate classes tonight and your flying lessons tomorrow, is sort of cool.

Translation: Don't sit around waiting for him. Do something fun while waiting for him.

Take a vacation. Jetting off with nothing but a bikini and the promise of a postcard gives him a small taste of life minus you. Plus, the freedom to flirt when you're ostensibly single cuts both ways, and if he's into you, that'll stick in his craw. "When my girlfriend told me she was going on a cruise with three of her friends, I figured, cool -- three weeks of bachelor days ahead," says Todd James* (names have been changed), a 29-year-old New York City public-relations executive. But then he saw how excited she was about the trip. "She kept talking about how they were going to get crazy -- and two of her friends didn't have boyfriends. I doubted Amy was going to sit on the boat drinking pina coladas alone while they hit the town." Long story short: The night before she left, he initiated The Talk.

Sounds like a lot of money and effort to get the equivalent of getting drunk and sleeping with one of his friends.

Act as if you've already had The Talk. In other words, take liberties. Adopt the role of the one and only girlfriend, fiancee, or whatever relationship status you aspire to. With our notorious lack of short-term memory, your guy may assume you two have already had The Talk, but he may not remember exactly when.

You can take this a step further and start acting this way before you even go out on a date. Just show up at the house of the guy you like in your pajamas and he may not even notice that he has never looked at you twice before.

Go out with your pal "Rocco." Men have a problem with so-called guy friends, men with whom women claim to have platonic relationships. In fact, I use the term so-called because guys don't believe there is such a thing as a guy friend, especially when it comes to a girlfriend they care about.

Translation: You don't have to actually sleep with someone else to make him think you're sleeping with someone else.

Mouse Words alternative advice: If your boyfriend is the sort who thinks that you sleep with all your male friends, dump him immediately.

Make a major independent financial decision. Talk about buying a car, a plot of land, a house, or maybe a Cessna. The reason: You're making him aware that you don't need him to move your life forward.

Is it me or does this article imply that men automatically don't want something if they think a woman wants it?

Anyway, buying a house might make a man commit if the guy you're seeing is a gigolo who is looking for a permanent sugar mama and was only holding back until he saw how much money you make.

Ask him if he's ever been to Guam. Or New Mexico. Or Phoenix. "I hear they have giant lizards there," you might say, toying with your pasta. "I'd like to live where there are giant lizards." By contemplating a big move -- to another city, country, or hell, another apartment (and out of your shared bedroom) -- you show him you're antsy with the current setup.

Translation: Tell him that you are fixing to leave and take your pussy with you. It might be easier to follow this advice if you are just straightforward about it.

Lastly, buy him a compass. Literally pick up a compass at a camping store, and attach a note that reads, "When you figure out where you're going, let me know. I may be here, but I may not. Love, (insert your name here)."

Screw that. If you're going to be cute about it, then you definitely should say, "If you don't commit I'm leaving and taking my pussy with me." Not only does it get the message across, no matter what his answer is your friends will treat you like a hero.

249 Comments:

Blogger Linnaeus said...

Now, I don't claim to be the most enlightened guy on the planet, but I was under the impression that what is supposed to happen was some kind of mutual negotiation, in which each partner expresses as clearly as he or she can what he or she wants. Sometimes this doesn't work out, you break up, and you start over again. Or not.

Obviously, I've been a fool this whole time.

11/27/2004

 
Blogger zuzu said...

I hate to find myself agreeing with Cosmo on anything, but four of those things (take up sports -- though since when is karate "extreme"? -- go on vacation without him, make major financial commitments and see your guy friends) were good advice, albeit for way different reasons than they mean. Those are good things to do because you're someone with an identity of your own and you enjoy doing them/you have a life and friends outside your boyfriend/you're not waiting for a man to come provide for you. The creepy subtext is that you only assert your independence to wake your man up and do what you want him to, which is take away your independence.

And people wonder why I'm still single.

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Make the Women Feel Good : Just like men, woman love feeling good about themselves.

Showing Love : Although hearing the words, I love you is special and important.

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Go on a Date : Especially for married couples, but even for some dating couples, start dating.

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I Forgive You : If something has happened in your relationship causing the trust to waiver, you will have many things to work through.

Day at the Movies : Have a movie marathon some rainy or cold Saturday.

Dinner by the Fire : Order in some of your favorite food, open a bottle of fine wine, light some candles.

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Adore your Mate : Appreciate and love them for the person they are.

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Night of Passion : Intimacy and passion in relationships is not only important but also healthy.

Cuddle Time : When couples first start dating, cuddling is usually a part of their everyday existence.

Make the Women Feel Good : Just like men, woman love feeling good about themselves.

Showing Love : Although hearing the words, I love you is special and important.

Realistic Expectations : No matter how wonderful and flawless your mate seems, no one is perfect.

Go on a Date : Especially for married couples, but even for some dating couples, start dating.

Control Your Anger : Every relationship has difficulties, and sometimes, there can be some intense arguments.

I Forgive You : If something has happened in your relationship causing the trust to waiver, you will have many things to work through.

Day at the Movies : Have a movie marathon some rainy or cold Saturday.

Dinner by the Fire : Order in some of your favorite food, open a bottle of fine wine, light some candles.

A Day at the Spa : Show your appreciation for the hard work that takes.

Keep in Touch : It is important that you keep in touch with each other often.

Motivate Each Other : Find a mutual incentive that will motivate both of you.

Adore your Mate : Appreciate and love them for the person they are.

Make Eye Contact : Think back to the first time you saw your now mate.

Respect Privacy : When two people come together in a relationship, each person has their own set of history.

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Make the Women Feel Good : Just like men, woman love feeling good about themselves.

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Make Eye Contact : Think back to the first time you saw your now mate.

Respect Privacy : When two people come together in a relationship, each person has their own set of history.

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Anonymous relationship advice guide said...


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Start Over : When couples first get together, everything is new and exciting.

Lighten Up : Often when couples have gone through or are going through some bumpy spots in their relationship, things tend to get serious.

Night of Passion : Intimacy and passion in relationships is not only important but also healthy.

Cuddle Time : When couples first start dating, cuddling is usually a part of their everyday existence.

Make the Women Feel Good : Just like men, woman love feeling good about themselves.

Showing Love : Although hearing the words, I love you is special and important.

Realistic Expectations : No matter how wonderful and flawless your mate seems, no one is perfect.

Go on a Date : Especially for married couples, but even for some dating couples, start dating.

Control Your Anger : Every relationship has difficulties, and sometimes, there can be some intense arguments.

I Forgive You : If something has happened in your relationship causing the trust to waiver, you will have many things to work through.

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