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Wednesday, February 16, 2005

Zepplin is tedious, so please get over it

What's a blog for if not expressing redundant opinions? Just like in the last post, I resisted commenting on this earlier, but I can't help it now. The Led Zepplin fans have swarmed on Salon to attack Neal Pollack for saying he thinks Green Day is better than Zepplin, and frankly, they need to get a life. (So says the woman who is attacking the attackers on her blog.)

Here's my opinion, and you're welcome to disagree, if you'd like. But don't think I won't worry that I will soon be spotting you at a kegger with your hair in a ponytail wondering why the cute girl who looks like Bjork won't talk to you. Zepplin is a tedious bore. And demanding that other fans kneel before them in worship, and thereby kneeling before their tedious fans in adolation is exactly why people feel the need to pick on them, their fans and muscle cars, just to cover all our bases.

Am I an insufferable hipster because I hate Zepplin? Sure, why not? I don't think I really have the time to be an insufferable hipster and my attitude is far too "Gee, shucks" really to pull it off, but whatever. Regardless of my reasons for saying so, the fact of the matter is that classic rock is a fucking racket. The only purpose behind setting aside certain bands from the 60s and 70s and deeming them "classic" is to flatter male Boomers. And to dare say that anything else might be better is apparently to cause an entire generation's balls to retreat directly into their bodies, as is evidenced by this letter.

Pollack continues to undermine his credibility by publicly proclaiming his ignorance of the existence of one the preeminent guitar legends of classic rock -- Dickey Betts.

The bottom line is how can a person be a music critic, and actually a published author, while seemingly possessing the musical acumen of a pre-pubescent teenage suburbanite?

Aw, seriously--fuck that. I don't think you have to be braindead to like rock music or anything, but this guy used the words "preeminent" and "acumen" in the same fucking letter about a rock band that took a bunch of classic blues riffs, tore them shit, barfed them all over the stage and got their cocks sucked nightly for it.

And younger people who worship the music of the Boomers at the expense of all that came before or after? Have some dignity, please.

I am calling you naive -- actually, ignorant, naive and/or biased. I think you need to do some homework on Zeppelin. Just because your teeny-bopper days were spent listening to Green Day (as were some of mine) doesn't make this a monumental band. You can make such a statement because you've heard "Stairway to Heaven" on the radio.

Slurring Green Day as the music of your teeny-bopper days--oooh, burn! God knows that Led Zepplin always had a fan base of mature, thoughtful adults, as my mother no doubt was when she got her first Zepplin album in high school. Don't let the giggly inscriptions in her yearbook fool you--she was a first class burgeoning music critic. And sure, it may have seemed that my stoner dad and his friends just liked to smoke pot and listen to Zepplin and Floyd and yes, Fleetwood Mac to pass the time, but they knew that they were making music history. How could they not?

Like Zepplin if you want to, but I got sick of the adulation in high school and I'm sad to see even younger people than me falling for this shit. Anyway, it's downright cruel to worship Led Zepplin or even listen to a radio program that says, "Get the Led out" at any point in its broadcast. Robert Plant's ego is big enough and if it gets any bigger, he may blow up from the pressure. Hmmmm....then again, maybe it would be best to keep puffing him up.

63 Comments:

Anonymous Olaf said...

Am I an insufferable hipster because I hate Zepplin?Hipster, naw.
Insufferable, maybe.

2/16/2005

 
Blogger Norbizness said...

Personally, I think Neal said that in order to generate publicity. Whether you like Led Zep or not, comparing one of the most influential bands of the last 35 years to a 12th generation Buzzcocks cover band is a bit of a disservice... and I like Green Day.

I think most of your frustrastion is directed at the classic rock format; the Zeppelin catalogue is remarkably diverse than playing "Black Dog," "Whole Lotta Love," and "Stairway to Heaven" would lead one to believe. As Prince once said "Led Zeppelin, for example, would make you feel differently on each song."

Of course, I am loathe to institute enforced boomer worship of any band, which is its most noxious when the Beatles are discussed with anyone.

2/16/2005

 
Blogger Roxanne said...

Because of my Lenten promise to myself, I'm not allowed to discuss this. But, I want to. I really, really want to.

2/16/2005

 
Blogger zuzu said...

How can you compare two bands with such entirely different styles and who come from entirely different milieus (milieux?)?

I like Zeppelin. I don't worship them, and if I never hear Stairway again I will die a happy woman. But they have an incredibly varied catalog of music and were apparently pretty revolutionary when they broke.

Green Day, for all the sharpness of American Idiot, is derivative. I also can't stand Billie Joe and his fake pseudopunk sneer. No, I *don't* have the time to listen to you whine.

OTOH, I felt the same way about the Beastie Boys at first, so maybe Green Day will grow on me now that they seem to be dropping a pose and writing better stuff.

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Blogger Amanda said...

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You're probably right, Nor. I hope I make it clear that my own deep down desire to be free of listening to the masturbatory music that surrounded me in my childhood and adolescent years cannot really be disentangled from my judgement. Also, I don't give two shits about Green Day, so this was mostly an excuse to pick on a) Robert Plant and b) classic rock radio.

2/16/2005

 
Blogger Linnaeus said...

My attitude toward music is similar to my attitude toward beer and wine:

Good music is whatever music you like. Period. If someone tells you, "Oh, I don't like Band X," that's one thing. If he or she tries to tell you, "Boy, Band X sucks! How can you listen to them?", well, then he or she is just being insufferable and you should feel free to ignore said person.

2/16/2005

 
Blogger Diane said...

Love Zeppelin (a friend recently gave me the BBC Sessions as a gift). What I can't stand is a journalist taking two bands that have nothing to do with each other and deciding that one is "better."

2/16/2005

 
Blogger FoolishOwl said...

When Green Day took off, there was a very active punk music scene in Berkeley -- there were many, many active bands. And, I think, Green Day really gets the essence of the style of the Berkeley punk scene -- there's the grunge element, but with a light-hearted playfulness and a certain warmth to it.

Sometimes I enjoy listening to "classic rock," but where I'm living at present, the only alternative is "country" or extreme rightwing Christian talk radio. The thing that bugs me about "classic rock" is that they just keep playing the same songs, over and over, for *decades*. Literally.

There are hundreds of bands in the Bay Area, many of which I'd rather listen to than the stuff I hear on the radio. I imagine it's like that in most urban areas. The real trouble is that the record industry, which now owns most of the radio stations in the country, narrows the music broadcast to a tiny fraction of what's really out there.

But that's a general pattern in modern life, isn't it?

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Anonymous Anonymous said...

it hurts to me green day is good music(every one thinks they are)but i couldnt give a ratsass about them .I feel stupid cause i dont like them but damn it there so anyoing. i have tried to enjoy them but i cant stop laughing in there songs

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Anonymous Bulbous said...

There's really no comparison. Green day is an excellent band, but they simply aren't in the same weight class as Led Zeppelin. Many of their fans are simply experiencing punk rock for the first time.

Placing Green Day above Led Zeppelin is an understandable mistake that only the Americanocentric would make.

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