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Monday, December 06, 2004

The plebians should be making babies and giving up their dreams

Through Avedon Carol, this article proposing that we completely overhaul society so teenagers can get to marriage and babies as soon as humanly possibly. The idea of course is that it sucks that young people in their 20's are running around being happy with their jobs and independence and whatnot before they settle down to have children in a situation that's financially easier to manage than it would have been a decade before. The reason? Well the writer of this piece, Frederica Mathewes-Green, didn't get to enjoy her young adulthood so neither should you.

I got married a week after college graduation, and both my husband and I immediately went to graduate school. We made ends meet by working as janitors in the evenings, mopping floors and cleaning toilets.

She goes on to claim that it was the most wonderful thing ever. Sure it was. I know I'm jealous. Every time I hang out with my friends, have sex in the living room, have time to myself, get to eat something fancier than macaroni and cheese, have a little extra cash to spend, and get to sleep in on Saturday, I just sigh and wish that I could be cranking out the babies.

While the writer skirts the anti-feminism in this article, it's easy enough to see. If a couple marries young and starts having kids, one of them has to give up on the college education and career most of the time. There was never a magical point in history where teenage girls, as a rule, could shove their babies into the arms of grandparents and then go off to grad school every day and then work as janitors at night. It's not just selfishness that keeps young people from delaying marriage and child-bearing--they really don't think it's a great idea for kids to be raising kids.

But what's so wrong with a little bit of "selfishness"? I stand unconvinced that my inner life is lacking because I like having time to myself. But even people who are convinced that having children is the morally superior position to take should be wary of this. I don't really see the advantage of a race to the bottom--who can get married and have children the youngest?

123 Comments:

Blogger delagar said...

Not to mention the whole tone of that article -- "You need to get married early before your fertility begins to decline! So you can have more babies!" (No you don't! Look around! We have enough babies!) -- and the whole lack of any actual attention to reasoning or research (no sense that maybe divorce rates went up at the same time that people began marrying later for *other* reasons entirely unconnected to their ages? No attempt to find out the ages at which people really did marry in the past?).

Nope. Just intone "it is not good for man to be alone," and leap to the conclusion that we should marry eighteen year olds.

And then start'em up breeding.

And all will be well.

Right.

12/06/2004

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is my favourite part:

"We're saddened, but no longer surprised, at girls having babies at the age of 12 or 13. Between 1940 and 1998, the rate at which girls 10-14 had their first babies almost doubled. These young moms' sexual experiences are usually classified as "non-voluntary" or "not wanted." Asking boys to wait until marriage is one way a healthy culture protects young girls."

I can just imagine being a boy in her world. "Hey, it's okay to have sex before marriage, right? So what the hell, I'll just go RAPE A TWELVE-YEAR-OLD."

12/06/2004

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This charmer also looks back with fondness on child labor (teaches responsibility!) and on lower qualifications for jobs (who needs a doctor with 4 years of college, 4 years of medical school, and another 4 years of postgraduate clinical training - you should be able to train one in a 6 month course straight out of high school).
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