Mouse rant blog vent mouse.

Friday, December 17, 2004

Why not rant some more on how much breast implants bug me?

Okay, I admit. I take the very existence of breast implants personally, because I have small breasts and I don't like the implication that they are a "problem" that needs fixing. For the record, I feel the same way about nose jobs--I hate to see someone undergo the knife so she can look not like herself but like she cut out a face from a magazine and will be wearing that from here on out. But I'm less personally offended, if only because no one has ever suggested to me that I might consider a nose job, at least not yet. God only knows what will happen when the 2-3 "acceptable" nose shapes are whittled down to just the button nose.

Anyway, this editorial here that I got through Bitch is setting me off on another rant. It's a decent editorial about how gross and offensive it is that giving away boob jobs to the "needy" is a common shock jock schtick now. It's an opportunity for the jocks and their audience to indulge the fantasy that they are kings like the one in Arabian Nights, whose power is so great and standards so high that no mere human woman can ever satisfy them. Alas, there is no Scheherazade to save our asses with her wit this time around, and instead we're left with contestants like this who feel that painful surgery is the only way to enchant:

One past winner, an 18-year-old named Ashley, wrote on his Web site, "When I go jogging, the guys don't stare because my breasts aren't big enough to flop all over the place. I want the boys to drool…. I'm a hot piece of a--, new breasts would only double my 'nailability.'"

I would be careful there, Ashley, for the lesson best gleamed from Scheherazade's story is that your looks may get you into the bed at night, but your brains are what will get you that invite to breakfast.

Actually, the cult of plastic surgery reminds me of another ancient tale altogether.

Pygmalion saw so much to blame in women that he came at last to abhor the sex, and resolved to live unmarried. He was a sculptor, and had made with wonderful skill a statue of ivory, so beautiful that no living woman came anywhere near it. It was indeed the perfect semblance of a maiden that seemed to be alive, and only prevented from moving by modesty. His art was so perfect that it concealed itself and its product looked like the workmanship of nature. Pygmalion admired his own work, and at last fell in love with the counterfeit creation. Oftentimes he laid his hand upon it as if to assure himself whether it were living or not, and could not even then believe that it was only ivory.

(Which reminds me of David Cross's routine about John Ashcroft secretly hiding behind the curtain to make love to the forbidden boobie statue, but that's another story altogether.)

It all works out for this poor sap Pygmalion, when Aphrodite takes pity on the man and his statue-fucking ways and turns the statue into a real girl that he can marry and presumably start finding fault with the next day when he realizes that along with the flesh comes that dang womanly non-statue-ness. But alas, the story ends before this point and we are left there with the perfect fantasy, which is that your actual fantasy becomes reality. Dick Meyers again:

Many radio stations that run these promotions help women to nurture their self-esteem by allowing them to degrade themselves by posting pictures on the Web so listeners can vote pick a winner. The winners, of course, get before and after pictures.

Every drooling idiot with a mouse is now Pygmalion, telling himself that real women are simply inadequate while dictating the shape of the breasts of women who are nothing more than a flat screen to him.

Of course, I'm not hating on breast implants solely out of a feminist desire to free women of feeling that they have to take a knife to flesh to satisfy the whims of men who need to get a grip. I have my own aesthetics, too, and I think breast implants are hideous. How the hell is it that our collective culture has suddenly decided that the humble, soft, sloping breast that has been sculpted, painted, and praised in poetry for thousands of years would better please its fans if it resembled an underripe melon more than a breast?

448 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Maybe I'm crazy, but I always think that this look so many men go for nowadays - anorexic, but stacked - is based on demanding first that women look as much like a twelve-year-old boy as possible, and then demanding enormous cartoon-style breasts to prove that they actually like women and aren't latently queer.

I find the skinny-with-inflatable-chest look really disturbing, and beyond that, tragic. I don't really have a feminine ideal...but I have tended to get involved with what a lot of folks nowadays would consider "plump" girls (i.e., they have waists), which means I've spent most of my adult life listening to impossibly beautiful women complaining about how "unattractive" they were. And one combination I really liked, which a few sweethearts of mine had - wide hips and smallish breasts - is supposedly the worst body-shape possible! It's bad enough that so many good, kind, lovely people are being made to feel deficient...but a society that encourages them to mutilate themselves to this extent is sick beyond belief.

12/17/2004

 
Blogger Phila said...

Ooops...I meant to say they had HIPS, not waists.

12/17/2004

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I figure if guys don't like me, they can find someone else. I like how I look, although I'm a bit soft, and I will not be told to 'fix' things so someone else can be happy - they never will be, or at least as soon as I get sags and wrinkles we'll be back to the knife discussion again. I have happily ended up with someone who likes my mind *and* how I look - the last person kept trying to get me to fix various things.

On to the point of the comment - I grew up taking lessons from someone who had a very noticeable nose. Apparently he had gotten a nose job in his teens and had been very happy with it. Unfortunately, he was in a car accident and they had to reconstruct his face. His mother did not like the new nose, so she gave the docs pictures of him from before the nose job. She got her way. He gave up. Heh.

--Wendryn, pilot@wendryn.com, www.wendryn.com

12/17/2004

 
Blogger Deja Pseu said...

As someone who has always been larger in the breast department, I find the concept of voluntary breast enlargements baffling. I have to imagine that from a comfort standpoint, smaller is better. Also better from the standpoint of being able to wear blouses that don't gap between the buttons, requiring the Strategic Safety Pin Deployment.

12/17/2004

 
Blogger Earnest said...

How do you feel about other cosmetic surgery? Namely, sex-change surgery? Do you draw a line, or do you think the motivation behind them is the same as with breast and nose jobs?

12/17/2004

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mouse, how do you feel about implants after mastectomy? Is that different from enlargement? Why or why not? I've always thought if I lost my breasts, I wouldn't replace them, but that's not a popular attitude.

12/17/2004

 
Blogger Anne said...

I take the very existence of breast implants personally, because I have small breasts and I don't like the implication that they are a "problem" that needs fixing. Word, word, word! Luckily, my boyfriend really, really likes my breasts.

12/17/2004

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Breast implants have always frankly baffled me. It's incredibly hard to dress large breasts on a small frame, it's hard to find bras that fit and almost impossible to find attractive bras, and I can't remember the last time I went braless. A friend and i (we're both 32Ds) want to start up a consulation service for women who want breast implants, telling them the side of the story they *won't* hear from Maxim.

That having been said, I also resent the idea that my breasts make me stupid or slutty or a freeloader anything like that. They're just breasts. They grew all by themselves. I really didn't have any say in the matter, and don't really care. I like the damn things because they're *mine*, not because anyone tells me they're hot.

12/17/2004

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[I posted the last comment]

Not that I'm suggesting that anyone here was suggesting negative things about large breasts. It's just something stupid you get from time to time from men *and* women. Laa-aaame.

12/17/2004

 
Blogger Amanda said...

Post-masectomy breast implants seem within the realm of perfectly understandable, since you are trying to keep you something you lost. But even then, it's a little sad that there's that much effort to "fix" someone who has larger problems, like getting healthy again after having cancer.

Same thing with sex change operations. Someone who undergoes one isn't trying to "fix" something that's not broken; they have much larger problems than their breasts not conforming to an artificial standard. And the choices are made under vastly different kinds of pressure. Transsexuals' choice isn't received with wide-open arms by the larger society but usually met with confusion and curiousity, if not outright hostility. In contrast, women who get breast implants are flattered and petted for their choice to capitulate to artificial demands that they achieve and inhuman look for the sexual pleasure of (some) men.

12/17/2004

 
Blogger zuzu said...

And one combination I really liked, which a few sweethearts of mine had - wide hips and smallish breasts - is supposedly the worst body-shape possible!Well, unless you live in Brazil.

You know, I get a little weirded out when people start discussing when it's "okay" to get plastic surgery. I really don't like the idea of passing judgment on people's motiviations to have surgery -- it's uncomfortably like deciding which reasons for having an abortion are "okay."

That being said, there are certainly a lot of people who should be exploring other ways to work out their life problems (I'm looking at you, Jocelyn Wildenstein). I do hate that implants are so pushed, particularly with the risk of scarring inside the breast (I think it's called encapsulation??). Plus, it's something that is done mostly for men and is usually so obvious.

I'm someone who's had a couple of cosmetic procedures, after I lost a lot of weight. I have gained some weight back and will have further procedures when my weight loss and wallet allow. The surgeon who performed my breast lift suggested I get implants because it's hard to tell what kind of result you're going to get, and since I'm tall and hourglassy, he felt it prudent to maintain balance. I refused, and now that I've put some weight on, I have triple D cups that I would love to get rid of entirely.

I also don't know what it's like to hate your nose or something specific. I had nasal surgery a couple of years ago to fix a deviated septum, and I had no trouble convincing my insurance company that I wasn't just trying to get a backdoor nose job, since I have a button nose that I'm entirely happy with other than the internals.

12/17/2004

 
Blogger nerdlet said...

I've had multiple men inform me that virtually all the people (note the gender-neutrality) who have cosmetic surgery have great self-esteem and are getting implants and tummy-tucks and labiaplasty out of their own free choice, just a completely random and natural choice unrelated to anything else in the world that just happens to make them feel really good. Urgh.

I'm so sick of "free choice" used to mean "no gun was held to her head."

12/18/2004

 
Blogger Amanda said...

All these comments really kind of give me a lot to think about. Also, I had an interesting discussion with a friend about sex change operations vs. plastic surgery and he convinced me that the lines may be blurry. Zuzu, I'm sure you know that I'm no enemy of dressing up, looking cute, etc. These are pleasures of their own. But there is a line where you are succumbing to lies and bullshit. That line is increasingly hard to see, though I know that if someone who looks like me capitulates and gets breast implants, she's completely crossed the line.

But it's not black & white to me. I understand getting surgery to "fix" defects, abnormalities, etc. I really do. Whether or not that's legit is another topic entirely.

But getting plastic surgery to "fix" things that cannot be considered "defects" by any definition but for the one that benefits the plastic surgeon, well, that I think I can most firmly criticize.

12/18/2004

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Surgery, fad diets, “going to the gym”, these people have no sense of self. Business love consumers (male and female) who rely on others opinions for there self worth. I’ve talked to women who despise the history of Madison Avenue pitching products to women that should make feel more like “women”, but they see a difference with it being pitched to men with the “metrosexual” tag. If people were comfortable with themselves this would not be a topic. Take some responsibility for you actions, just because you choose to change your body doesn’t mean people should respect you for your choice. Your ego might say your right but you just might be and idiot, sucker and chump.

12/18/2004

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Surgery, fad diets, “going to the gym”, these people have no sense of self. Business love consumers (male and female) who rely on others opinions for there self worth. I’ve talked to women who despise the history of Madison Avenue pitching products to women that should make feel more like “women”, but they see a difference with it being pitched to men with the “metrosexual” tag. If people were comfortable with themselves this would not be a topic. Take some responsibility for you actions, just because you choose to change your body doesn’t mean people should respect you for your choice. Your ego might say your right but you just might be an idiot, sucker and chump

12/18/2004

 
Blogger zuzu said...

I hardly think that going to the gym is the result of poor self-worth.

12/18/2004

 
Blogger Fred Vincy said...

"I had no trouble convincing my insurance company that I wasn't just trying to get a backdoor nose job, since I have a button nose that I'm entirely happy with other than the internals."

Zuzu,

Did the insurer really insist on seeing your nose before approving the surgery? If so, that strikes me as tremendously offensive, both because of the presumption that you might be a fraud-doer and because of the presumption that they could tell by looking at your nose whether you might want plastic surgery on it.

12/18/2004

 
Blogger Amanda said...

Fred, I've heard some horror stories about how blase plastic surgeons can be when talking to a patient about what's "wrong" with her body. I can see that attitude getting picked up easily by insurers. Why not? We live in a culture, obviously, where men feel free to go to a website and vote on whose breasts are the ugliest and think nothing of it.

12/18/2004

 
Blogger james d said...

I love how men have NO IDEA what a given weight looks like on a woman (I've had guys tell me that anything over 110 is "too fat"--uh, hello? there are plenty of women who would be dead at that weight) and they also seem to have no comprehension of the idea that breasts are made of fatty tissue, so when a girl starts losing weight, the breasts are going to go, too.

I also know a lot of anorectics who had perfectly great bodies until they starved themselves down to 80 lbs, then they got breast augmentation so they could continue to starve and still have what guys wanted.

How my own anorexia connects to this, I have no idea.

But I agree with you, Amanda: most cosmetic surgery is insulting. And when it comes right down to it, men are not in bed with you thinking how you've got lovehandles or your breasts are too small. They are thinking, "YES! I'M TOUCHING A NAKED WOMAN!"

12/18/2004

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

How do you feel about other cosmetic surgery? Namely, sex-change surgery? Do you draw a line, or do you think the motivation behind them is the same as with breast and nose jobs?This seems to fit what I know of current science, except for the tone of certainty. Oh, the primer leaves out some details, but elsewhere the author discusses varieties of transsexuality.
--Omar

12/18/2004

 
Blogger zuzu said...

Did the insurer really insist on seeing your nose before approving the surgery?They certainly want proof that you have an actual deviated septum -- I had to get a CAT scan, which did show the extent my septum projected into my right sinus cavity. The thing is, "deviated septum" is a very common cover for nose jobs, and insurance companies want proof that it's for real.

I knew a woman in college whose parents had told her they'd only pay for a nose job if at least part of it was picked up by insurance. She didn't have a deviated septum, so no go until she broke her nose playing volleyball.

12/18/2004

 
Blogger james d said...

I just skimmed through that "transsexual primer" that Omar posted, and it seems like it's full of a lot of propaganda to me. Most of the stuff in it is not what I believe to be scientifically proven (for instance, they compare being transsexual to being homosexual, saying it's caused in the brain during development--and as far as I know, the whole world is still in a huge argument over whether being gay is a choice or innate. Science has not been able to prove either way yet). It also claims that transsexuals are, on average, 30 pts higher on an IQ test than other people (not to mention more creative!). Smells like bullshit to me.

12/19/2004

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm consulting with a plastic surgeon on breast reduction (my bras are 42GG and are too small, so, yes, it's a health issue.) and I can tell you that yes, the insurance company is insistent on photos. They want documentation of the health effects, they want photos of rashes or welts caused by the bra straps, they want x-rays, they want height-weight ratio stuff (Hey, maybe I *don't* have big breasts, maybe I'm just fat and if I lose some weight it would all go away!), and they want photos of my breasts. Lots of 'em. They apparently may also decide they want me to see a mental health professional to determine if this is medically necessary or a self esteem (read: cosmetic) issue. So, I'm having loads of fun with it.
It's expensive, and I didn't expect them to take my word for the medical necessity thing, but I'm starting to think that the whole point is to humiliate me into paying for it myself.
I used to laugh when I met women who wanted implants. Now I just cry.

12/19/2004

 
Blogger mythago said...

Fred, I'm about the last person in the world to say anything nice about insurance companies, but here I have to disagree with you--they *do* get many fraudulent claims, and a genuine medical problem (like a deviated septum) is very easy to prove.

I would have to disagree with Amanda that all plastic surgery is geared towards 3-4 different looks. Sure, there are sleazy plastic surgeons. There are also smart plastic surgeons who understand that if you give your patients all little button noses, many of them are going to be unhappy with the results, and there goes your long-term practice. (I say this as someone who voluntarily and happily got a nose job, and my surgeon never tried to talk me into a button nose. I believe he would have talked me OUT of one, if I'd been dumb enough to say that's what I wanted.)

The flip side of this problem is that while a surgeon should honestly advise his or her patients, at some point you are crossing the line into paternalism, aren't you? If a patient truly wants D-cups, and is healthy, and understands all the risks, who is the surgeon to say "I'm sorry, but that promotes a cartoonish and negative view of women's bodies, go home and be grateful for the A-cup God gave you"?

(I admit I also don't get the thing about big breasts. Big, small, it's all good.)

12/19/2004

 
Blogger Amanda said...

I don't think I am being paternalistic, really. I am not advocating making laws against plastic surgery and if you want to screw up your breasts, go with god and all that. But I reject the notion that women make the choice "freely" to do so. They make the choice under an onslaught of advertising and pressure that's only purpose is to leave them with such low self-esteem that they feel that their only recourse is the knife.

How is it really different from other consumer purchases that, if you take the onslaught of marketing away, make no real sense whatsoever? Breast implants are the Hummers of surgery--big, gaudy, pointless, does nothing that the smaller version didn't do better and self-perpetuating. Breast implants are clearly feeding themselves, if you will; the more women who have them, the more women feel they have to have them or lose out in the competition for men. They're also like steroids, in that sense--once a certain number of baseball players started to use them, everyone felt they had to in order to be in the game.

12/19/2004

 
Blogger mythago said...

Wouldn't that argument apply just as well to women seeking breast reconstruction, though? Societal pressure that women must have visible breasts and all that.

12/19/2004

 
Blogger Amanda said...

I think there's a difference between replacing what's lost through surgery and reconstructing a perfectly fine body to fit a completely made-up standard. Believe me, if thousands of men suddenly decided that it was more important to have a number 12 inches rather than to have their own, normal-sized but sensitive dicks, I would be upset at that, too. My concern is that for no real reason we are suddenly demanding that women go through an artificial and painful process to look "right". It reminds me of nothing so much as foot-binding.

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