What Kind of Feminist Are You?

New blogroll member Utopian Hell is starting a new meme that I like and wish to spread--What Kind of Feminist Are You? I immediately thought, "a smart-assed feminist" but then decided that I was probably giving myself way too much credit. And anyway, Astarte has a great list of questions.

1. Most of us go by pseudonyms on the internet to avoid rabid ex-lovers, identity thieves, and dirtbags that have nothing better to do. These names have special meaning to each person and often tell a bit about that person. If you use a pseudonym, list it and explain why you chose that particular name. If you don't, well, just tell us your name.

My blog is called Mouse Words, but I use my real name, which is Amanda Marcotte. I don't necessarily post it every day, but I'm not anonymous by any means. I don't have any rabid ex-lovers, so I guess it's all good. Mouse Words comes from the fact that my family calls me the Mouse. Make of that what you will.

2. Are you single?

No. I am not married either. I have a boyfriend with whom I share two cats, a bed and a mortgage.

3. If yes, do you believe in marriage as an institution?

Well, I know people who are married, so if I didn't believe in it, I'd be lying to myself like I was a creationist or something. Kidding. I don't have anything against marriage and may go there myself some day. I do think that marriage needs to be rethought completely. It should be legal for homosexual couples. It should be as easy to get out of as to get into. It should not involve female subjugation on any level. And people need to get with the program and realize that the wedding industry is a money-wasting nightmare. A young couple starting out should take that money and buy a house.

4. Do you have any children?

No and we're not having children. We have cats, though.

5. Was your mother a feminist?

Trick question, albeit not on purpose. My mother would not likely describe herself as a feminist, but as I've said before, a lot of feminists are afraid of the word. Does my mother believe in women and women's equality? Undoubtably. Did she raise us to believe that womanhood was no impediment to being smart or talented? Yes, she did. Like all of us, she had to make her decisions in the world she was born into. I hope one day that women do not have to compromise themselves just to survive in a world made by men for men.

6. Reach back into your brain and remember what made you a feminist in the first place. Tell us the story, and let us know if those things still weigh heavily in your decision to continue being a feminist.

I don't remember deciding to be a feminist or not to be. Being a literal-minded girl, I realized that if "feminist" meant believing in women's equality, then I was a feminist. Not to say that it wasn't hard, but I was never one to play linguistic games and say that I'm not a feminist because that's what some people want to hear.

But going from being someone who just called herself a feminist to someone who spends a lot time reading and thinking about feminism came around because I was intellectual and nerdy, and any woman like that finds herself being talked down to repeatedly without just cause. Have enough men who aren't as smart as you talk down to you and spend enough time reading about really smart women who were marginalized because of their sex and you will be forced to start making decisions. Either you will see sexism for what it is and adopt a feminist viewpoint, or you will be one of those sad women who try to get honorary man status by putting down other women. (See: pretty much all anti-feminist women who don't get that it's a contradiction to work outside of the home telling other women to go back to the home.) Get told by guys who get worse grades in math class than you that women aren't as good at math or be told that women can't write, play music, paint, etc. when you have books and c.d.'s out the kazoo showing otherwise and you'd turn explicitly feminist quickly, too.

I began to really get interested in feminist theory when I picked up The Second Sex by Simone de Beauvoir (yet another woman who got eclipsed because she was surrounded by men who were her equals in talent but more famous because they had some dangly bits). It's thick but pretty easy to read once you get into it, and a perfect introduction to feminism.

7. What would you call your "personal style"? Do you like makeup/hate makeup? Jeans and t-shirts or flares and babydolls? Do you own any high heels? Give us an indication of the types of things you like to wear and the image that you portray that makes you the most comfortable.

I wear make-up occasionally when I go out, but not usually as I am lazy and it gives me zits if I wear it too much. For the circles I run in, I'm pretty femme-y. I wear alot of skirts when I go out, but mostly because they look cool with T-shirts and they are cool in hot weather. I am fond of looking sorta juvenile deliquent-y, circa 1950's, with the dark jeans and saddle shoes or sneakers. I do not wear padded bras or anything else that obscures the shape of my body, as I think that's kind of lying. Generally, I eschew anything too elaborate. The general rule of thumb is wear simple, classic clothes and you will never cringe at old pictures. I usually wear bold colors, though--red, purple, things like that. I also have a few shirts with stuff written on them as long as it's a band I really like or just plain weird and not overly elaborate. My favorite T-shirt is probably my X-Ray Spex shirt. My favorite jeans are Levis 501's.

But since I have a strange girly side, I love high heeled shoes and have like 30 pairs. My favorites were my leopard prints, but they recently died.

8. Are you a crazy cat lady?

God, I wish I could say no. The cats are in the next room thinking, "Not enough, she's not." My boyfriend is a way crazier cat person than me, I think.

9. What do you think of men in this crazy world? Are they the problem or the solution? Are they all guilty by association, or is it a social ill that we all have to face?

They can live.

Okay, I'll actually answer the question. As is obvious except to those who think liking men means being sniveling and servile should have guessed, I like men a lot. My close friends are probably even between men and women, but I spend most of my social time with a buncha dudes. I think blaming men is a pointless exercise, since they were born into the same world we were, and anyway they should be judged as individuals just as surely as anyone else.

That being said, I am not going to pretend that sexism is a force of nature that just happens to single out women. Those who are guilty of perpetuating the sexist status quo are mostly men and a few women who are trying to curry their favor, and the beneficiaries of sexism are generally men. Sexism cannot be defeated without disturbing male privilege, which is going to upset men who have come to expect it. Too bad. Men who scream and cry about having their privileges taken away from them are doing the same thing as white people who scream and cry about giving up white privilege or straight people who don't want gays to marry because they think marriage is a secret special club just for them. Grow up and get over it, I say.

But there's no reason not to treat men like potential allies. They shouldn't get special attention or special favors for embracing feminism, of course, since that's just perpetuating male privilege. But I don't see why we shouldn't make some effort to bring them into the fold.

10. Who do you think is more dangerous to feminism: Women who portray feminism as dirty and unfeminine, or men who wish to control their wives through monetary and other means? Or do you have another theory all together?

Make no mistake, anti-feminist men are the biggest problem feminism faces. In our efforts to seem non-sexist, we have accepted the idea that since some women are part of the oppression that men and women are equal oppressors. The sexist establishment has taken advantage of this urge by using women as their figureheads. But behind the figureheads is an elaborate, mostly-male power structure dedicated to keeping men in power over women in the public and private arenas.

I understand the urge to frame the problem of sexism without confronting the issue of men's role in it so as to avoid being called a "man-hater". But the truth is, that slur is handed out to any feminist who crosses paths with someone working to secure male privilege, no matter how scrupulously she tries to avoid blaming any men at all for the problem. Some men have grown up and dropped the desire to control, but not most. If all men could give up that desire tomorrow, then the few women who help build up the sexist establishment wouldn't have a reason to anymore.

Uncle Tom-ing behavior is annoying and people who participate in it should be held responsible for sure. But if there wasn't a power establishment to cozy up to, there wouldn't be any reason for the behavior to exist.

11. What is your political affiliation?

I vote for the Democrats. I have repeatedly voted against that fucker the Shrub, but he keeps winning. I am far more liberal than the Democratic establishment, but I'm practical enough to know that you can't hold out for perfect candidates.

12. What is the last book that you read?

I'm about to finish The Republican Noise Machine by David Brock.