More on an ugly obsession

Well, the filming of the MTV show that shall not be named has begun in Austin. And we have a cast list, at least a rumored one.

Areula 22 - Cauasian short dark-haired punk girl
Cheng 20 - Cantonese party girl
Dan 23 - Cauasian musclar guy
Freddy 22 - gay puerto rican guy
Jeff 23 - Cauasian country guy
Jo Anna 23 - Cauasian long haired brunette girl
Marc (or Marcus) 19 - black guy

Rumor has it that they have been seen all over the downtown area. This site has a list of etiquette rules to follow for fans of the show who interact with the cast and crew. For our purposes, consider a guide not of what not to do, but of what to do if you have half a chance.

All the crew really cares about is being able to film an undisturbed sequence without too many local goofballs screwing it up. So, what does this mean to you? Ignore them. Thinking about mugging for the camera? Don't. You will *never* be put on the show and will only end up looking like an ass-hat to anyone nearby.

Translation: Acting like an ass on-camera ruins their shot, so do exactly that every opportunity you get. Think of it as giving the editing crew overtime pay.

If all goes smoothly, a crew member carrying a release form on a clipboard will walk up to you and have you sign a form allowing your image to be used (and not blurred out). If nobody approaches you to sign a release, then whatever you did isn't going to be used (or you're going to be blurred out). Please try not to cry.

There are a number of things you can do with this advice, but the number one thing I suggest is bawling like a baby because they didn't give you a release form to sign after you made a lewd gesture at the virgin. And if you've ever watched the show, you'll know who the virgin is.

The producers have complained of photos being taken using flashbulbs. This has ruined a couple of good scenes more than once.

I don't think I need to elaborate on the Mouse Words alternate suggestion. I'm just amused that last night I was actually complaining that my camera flashed too brightly.

I can't believe that I even have to say this, but please don't think that you can hang around outside The House anytime you please. Especially at 3 AM after you've had too many Shiner Bocks. There is usually an undercover police officer watching the place 24/7.

That's good to know. Scratch the egging plans.

Remember the cop? He wants to throw you down on the ground. If the cop still decides to cuff you and drag you away, try not to cry.

I agree. A better plan is to yell, "MTV is brutalizing me!" as they drag you away kicking and screaming.

To sum up: Be yourself. Don't mug for the camera. Don't use a flash. Don't stalk the house. No crying.

And just because you may not want your face on MTV doesn't mean there aren't many other fabulous, if insufficiently sun-kissed body parts to get on camera.